Guilt Trips - How to Be Guilt Free

My mom was guilted into going to church yesterday. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad she went - even though I had to go with her - because what the pastor talked about really helped her through the current situation she's in. But the thing that bothered me most was the fact that she was guilted into going - by her best friend, no less.

You see, my mom is tired of always saying no to her friend when she asks us if we want to go to church. This time, she kind of made my mom feel bad, unintentionally guilting my mom into going.

Even though it can be unintentional, the fact remains that guilt trips are flat-out wrong. You cannot change someone, so you cannot change the fact that they may attempt to put you on a guilt trip. But you can control your reaction.

"But how?"

It's easier said than done, I know, but, put simply, you can't let it get to you. You can't let them make you feel bad because you don't want to do something. That's just not fair. They can't make you do something you don't want to do, and making you feel bad about it is a sign of selfishness. They shouldn't be trying to force you into something you are either uncomfortable doing, or just simply don't want to do. It's also - on your part - about honesty. If this is a friend or family member of yours, even if it hurts their feelings, you have to be honest. Tell them you don't want to do whatever it is they want you to do. Be firm if they try to make you feel guilty. Really, it's not fair to either of you.

~J*~

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